Job No. 12: Newsreader

I began today with the intention of taking up a suggestion from a user called Purity at the Digital Spy Forums and applying for the position of Forensic Accountant. After all, I'm a huge Gil Grissom and CSI fan and figured that this could be a brilliant means to experience that kind of excitement without wading through bucketloads of gore...

However, upon reading the job description, I was incredibly disappointed to find that there was very little mention of fingerprinting, DNA testing, ballistics or indeed any kind of violent crime scene reenaction (involving mannequins, tomato ketchup and a claw hammer). Apparently dead numbers just aren't given the same degree of importance as dead bodies in the modern criminal justice system...

So, instead, I decided to apply to be a Radio Newsreader with TFM Radio. Now this all came about because, the other day, the producer of the TFM Breakfast Show got in touch with my via my blog and asked if I would like to come on the show and witter on about what I'm up to. I duly did so this morning (a friend has kindly agreed to host an mp3 file of the interview - go here: http://www.solsbury-hill.co.uk/Interview1.mp3 if you'd like to listen to it in full) but, during the email conversation between us beforehand, it was mentioned in passing that TFM are looking for a newsreader. Thus, like some kind of rabid pitbull I refuse to let that mention go! And so, after talking on the radio this morning, the Producer agreed to try and get me an audition! :-)

I have concluded that being a Radio Newsreader must be a great job - all you have to do is read out loud for two minutes every half an hour and you get the remaining fifty six minutes in the hour all to yourself. While everyone else is slaving away you'd be able to drink tea (and dunk biscuits), ride your chair about the office in a wayward fashion, make abstract sculptures out of polystyrene cups, draw rude caricatures of your work colleagues and just generally relax...