Job No. 67 - Satellite Technician

Maybe it was because the radio was playing 'Intergalactic' by the Beastie Boys, but today I was inspired to look to the stars for my job application and so, while touring the Simply Hired recruitment site, I was delighted to find that Northern Trust were advertising for a particularly exciting position - Non-Resident Alien Tax Manager...

The job description asked that you possess "knowledge of the non-resident tax areas" and I felt that my grounding in astronomy could serve me well here, at least in getting my up to speed but I was a little wary as these sort of areas tend to be quite complex. I imagine that taxation for aliens throws up a number of thorny issues - for example, are they exempt from paying VAT as non-residents? And are they able to claim a fuel allowance when on official business (such as abducting people)?

And, just I was beginning to think that maybe this wasn't the right job for me I thought about the clientele - imagine having to tell him that he hadn't filed his annual accounts in a proper and timely fashion?

So, leaving aliens and their taxes behind, I saw a vacancy on Career Builder for a Satellite Technician. Now, when I think of spaceflight I have to admit that I tend to think of Cape Canaveral in Florida rather than Boise in Idaho, but this particular position with Star West Satellite demonstrates that interstellar industry is obviously branching out...

I was a little disappointed at the quality of the wage ($9-$15 per hour) considering that the job requires you to 'install satellites' but I figured that the sheer thrill of journeying into space on a regular basis would serve to compensate for this drawback. The exact mechanics of transport weren't dwelled upon in the job advert so I decided to enquire about this in my application letter:

Hi Chris

I am very much interested in the position of Satellite Technician, as advertised on career builder, and have forwarded you an up-to-date copy of my CV.

I have considerable technical knowledge in the area, although as of this moment it has been of a theoretical nature as I have not had the opportunity to have hands-on experience in the field. Nevertheless, I am confident I could deal with the complexities of the job with minimal training.

One aspect of the job I was interested to know more about was whether the transport was provided by the company or whether you would be expected to make your own way to a job site?

I trust you will give serious consideration to my job application and look forward to hearing from you shortly.

Regards

Oliver.

Hopefully I'll get a positive response from Star West Satellites and, within a couple of weeks, I'll be blasting off to mess around with some satellites; actually, I hear they need the Hubble Telescope fixed - a couple of spanners and a phillips screwdriver and I'm sure I'd have it sorted in no time...